Suicidal may end my suffering.

I spend the last 3 and half hour of my day feeling miserable. Why? Fucking why? It feel like the first day she broke my heart. Do I have to start all over again? I really can't take more pain now. Fuck. Didn't know she is so fucking important to me. I'm so dead now. I hope this bottle of wine will help me and to those my true friend. You better come out now an drink with me or else I might end up on the road.

Yeah I know you happy now don't have to show your happiness to me. I don't need to know. I rather die by stabbing myself. God! Can I kill myself now and throw my soul to the devil. Or can you stop the pain? I'm suffering now and how long do you want me to suffer. You taking pieces by pieces of me everyday. When will this end? Can I end everything now if I offer you my life.